Friday, 22 April 2011

Le ToLOLz Series 2

"One mistake is fine, making another mistake doesn't bring you closer to success"

As I told you, in this series I would write about my to-LOLz moment so that we can laugh at it together. This moment where I can think back and laugh at my silliness. This could be fun.

So my story goes like this. Once upon a time, there was a man, who needs to top up his credit for his phone. Then there he went to the store queued up at the counter, waiting for his turn to buy the top up card. He use Celcom Xpax. Then, the man just next to him in the queue coincidentally wanted to buy a top up card too. Then the man said, "top up maxis sepuluh (maxis top up RM10 please)".

Then his turn came. with celcom xpax he had in mind he said, "top up maxis sepuluh". the man at the counter gave him the top up card and received the payment. Upon receiving the maxis top up card, he went back to his room searching for coin to scratch the card. Suddenly he realized that waffak was he doing with the maxis top up card! What he wanted was celcom top up card! Le fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

That's the story. Obviously I was the idiot in this story. Sorry, I don't really know how to tell a story. I don't know how to make it sound interesting. Never have that talent.

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Le ToLOLz Series 1

"Mistakes are just another way of being human"

Mistakes. They happen just like that. They don't care the place, the time and the situation. They just happen. When they happen, you could just smile or mad. Laugh at yourself or disappointed with yourself.

Mistakes. Just the law of nature. You can't fight nature. You readers, what is the biggest mistake you have done in your life? Share please. It could be an awesome story to laugh at. Generally human are silly. Specifically me. I have done a lot of silly things that makes me laugh or facepalm  at myself. 

My story goes like this. It was a fine afternoon that day. Not really fine actually. I was fine. But the weather was not. It was raining cat and dog. Well, I was at Giant buying some groceries, milk and cereal. Then I go to the cashier. Things going fine till then. The cashier scanned the bar codes. Ok fine. The total was rm 19 something I can't remember the cents. Took out my wallet, saw the RM50 note. Fine took it out, gave it to the cashier while looking again at the cash register. Then I saw the cashier made this face.

I was like "what the hell is wrong with her? Just take the money!". Then I look at my hand, looking what did I holding. A FUKING RECEIPT! I thought I was holding a RM50 note! Natural reaction of me was

while actually in my head was 

So thats it. I paid took the balance and went out with this face

So if you have your story to share, just leave it in the comment section. I would glad to hear it from you. I'm sure you all also made mistakes. I had another one. Will write about it in the next post.

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Tuesday, 19 April 2011

Le Rage on Road

"Driving is an art"

Driving for most of the time is fun, but sometimes shit does happen. What is the shit? It is when you get stuck behind a lousy, slow driver driving his/her car slowly as they got infinite time in their life. Slow like they don't have anything to do in their life, enjoying driving at 10 km/ + enjoy to annoy the driver behind them. These 'patient' drivers have some similarities that i have noticed every time i encountered them.
1. If the driver is a man, he wears kopiah. Trust me. The kopiah would make them drive slowly. I think maybe because they bertasbih while driving. or reciting the whole quran on their dashboard. They can't focus when they doing something else. that's why the car move like a salamander running uphill.
2. If the driver is a woman. that's it. nuff said. the word woman is self-explanatory. 
3. People who talks on the phone.
4. People who drives slow but stays on the fast lane. Oi, you people, i gave signals, highbeam, slipstream, honk, revving, why you no understand! Tepi la wei!

While these slowpoke relatives brings rage to your heart and transfer it to your mouth, we have another category that would bring the rage to your hand. Giving international 'peace' sign is quite an eyesight when someone ask for it.
1. Driver who give signals AFTER they finished making a turn. You know la, this age, everybody talks about efficiency. To drive efficiently is to slipstream so the air resistance is lowered thus lowering the fuel consumption. How dangerous it could be if someone suddenly making a turn without signalling it first when you're slipstreaming behind them? 
2. Driver who slipstream behind you. What the hell are they thinking? Are they crazy to drive so close to the ass of your car. How if suddenly a monkey cross the road? For sure ass kissing will happen.
3. Driver who use highbeam all the time. F U! Are they blind enough to use the highbeam to see the pavement ahead? You're faking blinding me you angel! 

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Friday, 15 April 2011

Le Munching Noise

Do you have encountered this, during eating, your friend start eating and suddenly you hear "CHAP,CHAP, CHAP" sound? You don't know what that sound is. But its really loud and its near. And its annoying. You keep continuing to listen to the sound, while telling your brain to find the source. Your eyes practically move everywhere tracing the sound's path and there you have it! It is from the fuking mouth of your friend! Shit. No wonder sounds so close.

What this mafaker doing eating while stuttering unfathomable language? "CHAP, CHAP, CHAP". Damn! This doesn't sounds nice. It's not a good music. Doesn't create the nice ambient for eating. Doesn't improve my appetite. Now, i can't even listen to the news on tv.

Why you no close your mouth while chewing! Do you realize how many decibels is that CHAP, CHAP! It kill my brain cells mafaker. Ohh God, i have to be patient for this shit for at least half an hour!

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Thursday, 14 April 2011

Le U No Watch U Rugi

lolol so farney this shit.
only 26 secs video. if u no like, i give back ur 26 secs.

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Monday, 11 April 2011

Le Message

Will update this blog after my examination. Need to study. I never study. This is so not me. Come check this blog after 16th April. Prepared 5 drafts. Will post after exam.

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Saturday, 9 April 2011

Le Hypocrites

"Hypocites are good, they make fun of themselves"

Hypocrites. See them everywhere! Realize that? On the streets, in class, in mosque, at the market, on the internet, in the forum, television, radio, newspapers, books, toilets, anywhere you can think of. Except in heaven I guess. Haha lol not funny. I know.

I always hate hypocrites. Goddamn I do! These stupid pretender is not fooling anyone. I don't care if they fool themselves, because I think it is their human right. To be stupid and pretend not to. How irony of doing something that they oppose and condemn before.

I really hate those stereotypes who talks cock about religion. Quoting from this ustaz and ustazah which quotes from god knows who, which in facts are wrong! They never check the facts and they always think they are right! I bet any of you have at least meet one pious looking people who are stubborn as lazy fat cat who keep telling the same shit without ever checking the facts.

Let me tell you one thing. It can be sensitive. It is the common lies that everybody told. Sunnis says: Shiites believe that Gabriel was mistakenly deliver the prophecy to Muhammad bin Abdullah instead of Ali bin Abi Talib. Supposedly Ali bin Abi Talib should be the prophet instead of Muhammad. THIS IS BULLSHIT. Stop telling lies! If you want to discredit someone, do it right. Don't tell lies! You did discredit someone, it is you. YOURSELF.

Same thing, the 'pious' peoples who are against boyfriend and girlfriend thing. There are bunch of these fools and it seems like they can't do what they say. Or they can't say what they stood for. Oh how nice to see you talk about this 'against the maksiat' by preventing this kind of relationship. Most of these people have this in their mind: the boy and the girl are just horny as they are, and will definitely do something immoral when they are in the relationship. For god sake what the fuck is wrong with these people. Don't they have religion living in their heart? What the fuck make them have this kind of dirty thinking? Don't they have something else to think about? Do you think woman is a sex object? Fucking disgusting creatures! And they will blame devil for everything! Can't you just believe in your faith/iman?

And sometimes later, they would get themselves a boyfriend/girlfriend. Are you kidding me?! Can't stand these peoples. Full of shits and yet they feel proud of it. And there is many of them. Can't stand to be surrounded by this shitload of monkeys.

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.

Friday, 8 April 2011

Le First Post

This post should be something meaningful yet interesting. Well fine okay. Good. Hate to admit this. I don't know what to write. Shit. Should have known this.

Let me say hi to the mamaks from . Got some fags, trolls, dupes and whole bunch of gheyshiats there. Scary place indeed.

And hi to the readers. Could be im the only writer and reader of this blog. It could be. And it will be sad. Fark this negative thought.

Enjoy your stay here and make yourself home. Feel free to give comments, suggestions and to troll other readers.

So, im basically going to write about anything that ticks my mind. I know my mind is not really functioning well, not really good, so be it. Its my view im going to write and so this is it.

This is TOLOLZ, reporting for Le Troll's View.
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